Ganymede: Part 13

13

After all the excitement had passed, after the burst of adrenaline had subsided, Tanner felt exhausted. He hardly remembered leaving McDonald’s and walking back to the van. As Daddy adjusted the seats, Tanner only saw the tops of his Elmo shoes.

            “Come on, buddy. Climb into the van and lie down. Daddy’ll take care of that stinky diaper for you.”

            Tanner did as instructed. His mind wasn’t all there anyway, so it didn’t matter that the sliding door had been left open. It’s not like everyone in the restaurant didn’t know. What does it matter that those same people could see Daddy changing his baby’s diaper?

            Without saying another word, Daddy grabbed Teddy and pulled his baby’s pacifier from out of his short’s pocket. Daddy guided the bear into Tanner’s arms, and he eased the pacifier into Tanner’s mouth. The boy looked almost traumatized from his experience. Professor Lopez almost felt sorry for him. But this is what the boy wanted. At least, that’s what he said he wanted.

As Daddy looked down on his baby boy, he couldn’t help but see how much of a baby he really was. The boy did want this, even if he fought it. And he had tried very hard back in the restaurant. Tanner did want to be a baby again. Daddy knew it would just take some time to make the transformation stick. Right now, his baby boy needed a daddy, and Lopez was happy to be right there to help his baby boy.

Daddy lifted up Tanner’s shirt a little and unbuttoned the boy’s shorts. By placing a hand on his baby’s hips, Daddy coaxed Tanner to lift up. Daddy pulled the shorts down to Tanner’s ankles, revealing the heavily soiled diaper underneath.

Tanner closed his eyes in embarrassment, but didn’t offer up any resistance as Daddy pulled on tapes and started to work.

The mess was unbelievable. However, Tanner hardly noticed anything. Too many thoughts were swirling around his mind. Yes, he’d enjoyed the experienced he’d just had, but he was also terrified. Was this what he really wanted? What about his adult life? Was he willing to give that up? How much of a baby did Professor Lopez want? And where did Tanner’s potential as a lover come into play?

So many questions clogged Tanner’s mind that he saw everything through a haze, like those trippy moments when he was drifting between waking and sleeping, when shadows transformed into horrors.

Obviously, from the state of his come-soaked diaper, Tanner loved being humiliated like that. He loved losing control like that, but all of this scared him, and he was looking for some time alone to do some thinking.

Daddy finished cleaning his baby boy and put him into another diaper. The shorts were pulled back up, and he helped Tanner back into his car seat. Nothing was said. Daddy wanted to leave Tanner alone with his thoughts. The boy looked so tired he’d probably be asleep five minutes down the road, Lopez thought.

And he was right. Tanner dozed off a few minutes away from McDonald’s. The bear was still clutched in a firm grip, and Baby’s mouth held an equally tight grip on the pacifier. Neither was going anywhere any time soon, even as Tanner drifted deeper and deeper into sleep.

 The fifteen-minute drive didn’t feel as long going back to his house, but Daddy did use the time to think of what to do next. Tanner looked exhausted; and since this was his first experience with a potential Daddy/Baby relationship, it’s expected that the boy should be feeling conflicted about his new role. In fact, Daddy was quite sure once Tanner woke from his nap that the boy would want to go home and think things over. Having the boy stay for the entire weekend would be a dream, but Daddy knew better than to press the matter.  In order for Professor Lopez to realize his own fantasy, he’d have to be very careful with Tanner. Sometimes, like with real babies, people need space to figure things out for themselves. Baby needed the little side and the adult side to align so that both sides would get what they wanted and what they needed.

The van quietly pulled into the garage. Tanner didn’t wake, even when Daddy removed the straps of the car seat. There was some grumbling and a little shifting, but Tanner continued to sleep on as Daddy picked him up and carried his baby back into the house. The trek up the stairs and into the nursery was difficult, but Daddy managed it quite well. Thankfully, his baby was not that big. Daddy did, however, have to lay Baby in the rocking chair so he could lower the side rail of the crib. And even with this slight movement, Tanner slept on.

As gently as he could, Daddy removed Tanner’s shoes and shorts, picked him back up, and laid his baby boy into the crib. He pulled the blanket over his baby and watched for a minute as the boy continued to sleep. Somewhat surprisingly, the pacifier was still in his mouth.

Daddy gave Tanner’s head a loving pat and walked out of the room, turning off the light before he stepped out into the hall.

***

The late afternoon sun struck the window, peered through the blinds, and woke Tanner. For a moment, he forgot where he was. All he knew was that he felt comfortable. It took him a full minute before he remembered everything, including what had happened in McDonald’s.

            Tanner hugged his teddy tighter and curled up in his crib. The questions that had been swirling around in his head before he fell asleep came back to haunt him. He had promised to spend the weekend with Daddy; and while he didn’t want to leave, Tanner knew he needed some time to think things over. But he’d finish out the weekend first. He’d fulfill his promise to Daddy. That much he could do. Though, he didn’t know how fun of a baby he’d be for the rest of the evening.

            The afternoon heat was starting to make him uncomfortable, so he kicked off his blanket. To Tanner’s slight surprise, his diaper was wet. Wow, he thought, I’m becoming more like a baby the longer I stay with Daddy. Of course, the idea didn’t scare Tanner. Becoming more like a baby was exactly what drew Daddy and Baby together. Even at that moment, lying in his crib, cuddling his teddy, sucking on his pacifier, and wearing a wet diaper, Tanner knew that his dreams had come true. But was this really what he wanted?

            Tanner didn’t know just how long he lay awake, but soon Daddy came into the nursery to check on his baby boy.

            “How’s my little guy doing? He’s awake, I see.” Daddy smiled, and Tanner felt happy despite his reservations.

            Daddy pulled a chair next to the crib and lowered the side rail. “Just sit there for a moment, Baby. We’ve got to talk for a minute. Okay?”

            Oh no! What if Daddy knew about my reservations? What if he didn’t want a baby who wasn’t into this all of the time? Suddenly, Tanner was terrified. He imagined Daddy leaving him and sending him back to his adult life, and the thought filled him with horror. Leaving the life he’d lived for past two days drove all the fears he’d recently experienced away. Just the idea of living without Daddy was not a life he wanted.

            The fear must have shown on Tanner’s face.

            “Don’t be scared. You’re not in trouble or anything. I just wanted to talk about how you’re coping with all of this.

“I put you through a lot today. Maybe more than you were ready for. If you want to go home right now and end our time together now, I completely understand. We can take a short break and meet up again during another weekend to continue this experience. If you want, of course. We don’t have to do this all of the time. We could just ease into this lifestyle. I’m willing to do whatever I need to so that you’re comfortable, so that you feel safe.”

Tanner didn’t wait until Daddy finished speaking. He lunched from the crib and wrapped his arms around Daddy. “Thank you,” he said and hugged Daddy tighter.

A bit surprised, but enjoying his baby’s reaction nonetheless, Professor Lopez returned the hug and patted Tanner’s bottom. Holding his baby like that made everything so much better. Nothing could trouble them as long as they had each other.

“Hey, sport. How about we go down to the living room. I have some coloring books set out. You can color and watch some cartoons while Daddy makes dinner. How’s that sound?”

“Yay!” Tanner said through his pacifier. He reached back into his crib and grabbed Teddy.

Together, Daddy and Baby walked hand-in-hand out of the nursery and down the stairs. Just as he promised, Daddy had set out some coloring books on a blanket, just in front of the television. Adventure Time had been paused, and Daddy pressed play once he made sure his little boy had all the colors he needed.

Daddy then disappeared in the kitchen to prepare dinner. Of course, he’d come back into the living room to check on his baby boy, bring him a bottle of juice, and make sure the cartoons he wanted to watch were still playing.

Tanner, meanwhile, was thoroughly enjoying himself. Most of the fear and anxiety he’d experienced earlier in the day had subsided. It was still there, hiding somewhere in the pit of his stomach, but the act of coloring and the fun adventures of Jake and Finn pushed all that down. With Daddy, all of Tanner’s problems seemed to just vanish, nothing could be wrong so long as Daddy was around to make his baby boy feel safe and secure.

Part of a daddy’s job is to make sure his baby’s diapers don’t leak, and Daddy didn’t fail to check his baby’s diaper each time he emerged from the kitchen to check on him. As expected, the diaper grew soggier from Tanner’s multiple wettings—not that he really noticed them much. However, Daddy felt that the diaper could hold off until after dinner. That way, he could change Baby into his night-diaper.

Once dinner was ready, Daddy came back into the living room and pried his baby away from his cartoons and colors. Doing so didn’t require much coaxing, but Tanner wasn’t quite ready to leave. Dinner could wait, but Adventure Time and the beautiful art he was creating could not. According to Tanner, important things were happening in that living room. But, as good daddies know all too well, little boys need to be fed so that they can continue their adventures later.

Daddy led Tanner into the kitchen. There was a small breakfast nook on the far side of the kitchen, and it held a small table with two chairs. However, the thing that drew Tanner’s eye was the adult-sized high chair, and he immediately knew where Daddy was taking him.

The high chair was huge. As soon as Daddy helped Tanner into it and secured the straps, Tanner felt himself shrinking again. It was hard not to feel small in so large a seat. Tanner’s legs swung back and forth. He felt giddy sitting there like a little boy. Indeed, he felt even smaller when Daddy attached a bib around his baby’s neck. Like the shoes he had worn to lunch, Tanner’s bib had a Sesame Street theme. This time, however, instead of Elmo, the bib had Cookie Monster devouring a whole pile of cookies. Fitting, really.

Whatever Daddy had made smelled so good. Tanner’s stomach growled in anticipation. He no longer cared about the half-finished picture, nor the half-finished episode of Adventure Time. Daddy was right, as usual, Baby needed to eat.

On the menu for dinner that night was spaghetti and meatballs. Daddy liked the idea of Tanner eating spaghetti because it was messy, and he wanted to see Tanner trying to work his way through it. And to help make the task more difficult, Daddy provided his baby with a larger-than-usual fork. He filled his baby’s bowl up with pasta and a couple of large meatballs and set the bowl in front of Tanner.

Tanner picked up the large fork awkwardly and dove into his dinner. Daddy hadn’t provided Baby with a napkin, so Tanner’s face, bib, and shirt were soon covered in pasta sauce and noodles. But he didn’t care. The meal was so good Tanner didn’t realize how much of a mess he was making. Daddy ate his own meal and laughed as he watched his little boy get messier and messier with every bite; he loved watching those little bare legs swinging with happiness.

Dinner was a quick affair, and the conversation was minimal. Baby was enjoying eating and making a mess too much to be bothered with talking, and Daddy enjoyed watching his baby. Plus, both were pretty tired from the day’s activities. They were able to sit there and enjoy the near quiet of eating.

After both finished dinner, Daddy set a baby bottle full of water on Tanner’s high chair. He then took some baby wipes and cleaned his baby’s spaghetti-smeared face as Tanner drank from the bottle. The bib was removed, along with the spaghetti-stained shirt, which left Tanner in nothing but his wet diaper. Daddy helped his baby off the high chair and told him to finish coloring his picture and to finish watching his cartoons. And Tanner did just that, waddling his crinkling butt out of the kitchen and into the living room.

After Daddy cleaned the kitchen, he walked into the living room and found his baby boy asleep on the floor, cuddling his teddy bear. Tanner looked so adorable. And Daddy was proud to note that Baby had finished his bottle.

“Looks like someone had a long and tiring day. Let’s put you to bed.” Daddy squatted down, picked up his baby boy, and carried him up the stairs to the nursery. The boy hardly stirred. He merely clutched his Teddy tighter and leaned into Daddy’s warm chest.

Inside the nursery, Daddy laid Tanner into his crib, covered him with blankets, and raised the side rail.

Moonlight shined through the window, bathing the entire room in a silver glow. Daddy turned on the mobile hanging over the crib and watched his baby sleeping. So peaceful it was, standing there, listening to the soothing lullaby and gazing down upon Tanner. This was exactly what he’d always wanted. In that moment, nothing could force him to give any of this up. At least, nothing he could imagine.